Focus

This 20 year old hit me up ten minutes before the witching hour last night, a sure sign of someone looking for trouble.

After pawing through his pix, this one caught my eye, for obvious reasons. Dude plays World of Warcraft! And Guild Wars! I returned his kind message asking him if he still plays and what server etc.

Yah. I’m a relentless monster, I know. Recruit recruit recruit!

A Sad Sign of the Times

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***************** Date : 02-26-2009 ********************

Salute

Someone seems to have an itch he needs scratchin’. Just sayin’…..

How Big is Obama?

stolen shamelessly once again from JoeMyGod. quote from actor Alan Cummings. dont’ front like you hadn’t thought about it before now, please.

“”I’d like to see Obama naked. I think great leaders, charismatic leaders and men who are so confident and who have achieved so much, usually have big penises. I think there’s a correlation between the level of confidence, the level of the way a man can hold a room and the way he conducts himself in life, with his penis size — with his comfort with his penis size. So much of male psyche is taken up with how big your cock is; it’s a huge deal in our lives, and so when you’re confident about your penis size, it shows. Well, just look at him. Just the way he’s so kind of elegant and very confident in his body and himself. Also, someone told me that they worked out with him in a gym in Chicago, and it was big.” – Actor Alan Cumming, talking to New York Magazine.”

File Under “No Kidding”

Depression May Be Contagious, Experts Say

An Individual’s Mood May Affect That of Loved Ones

By RADHA CHITALE
ABC Medical Unit

March 28, 2008—

Ron and Carol Rossetti had a storybook romance. The two were high school sweethearts, went to prom together and married after college.

“He was like the fun in my life,” Carol Rossetti recalled. “But had I known the ride I was going to be in for, I’m not sure I would have signed up for it.”

Not too long after they were married, Ron would get into terrible tempers, Carol recalled, or become very depressed. Later on, as his business grew more successful, Ron would spend money lavishly on cars: A Lotus, a Viper, a Porsche, a Hummer.

Ron Rossetti’s erratic behavior took a toll on his wife. “I was just really unhappy,” Carol said. “I was wanting to find the answer without giving up the marriage.”

Carol Rossetti’s discontent may be no surprise to many people whose spouses suffer from mood disorders. Ron was diagnosed with bipolar disorder in his late 30s, and while the news explained some of his behaviors and brought Carol a measure of relief, his wife Carol was in an unusual and vulnerable position.

Spouses are at high risk for depression when one party has a clinical disorder like depression or bipolar disorder, because they spend a large amount of time with them and are emotionally invested in their well-being.

“Was she depressed? Absolutely,” Ron said. “Look what she had for a husband. & Was it a Dr. Jekyll or Mr. Hyde?”

Some studies show that if one spouse is depressed, the other can become depressed, and that up to 40 percent of people whose spouses have bipolar disorder get clinical depression. That’s according to Dr. Igor Galynker, director of the Family Center for Bipolar Disorder at Beth Israel Medical Center in New York and professor of clinical psychiatry at Albert Einstein College of Medicine.

Natural Born Mimics

“We can mimic other people’s facial expressions,” Galynker said. “When we mimic other people’s facial expressions, we also can adopt the mood that these people are in. It affects us, even on a superficial level.”

But such mimicry can go beyond the superficial and become emotional. Studies in which monitors track brain activity while a subject is shown smiling or frowning faces show that the areas associated with happy or sad emotions are active when the subject is presented with the corresponding face.

This ability to tune in to other people’s feelings, or empathize, can be useful, but it can also get a person in trouble if they are around someone who has depression.

“If a genetic predisposition exists, and a person is surrounded by people with a behavior, that may give rise to or create an environment that would fertilize that behavior,” said Steven Lappen, a writer and frequent public speaker who has bipolar disorder.

Lappen, 58, was diagnosed with bipolar disorder at 19 and said his manic and depressive episodes during his 20-year marriage made his wife feel invisible and caused her to withdraw from him, behaving as if she, too, was depressed.

“I was so blocked up, I couldn’t respond to her overtures,” Lappen said. “Outside of the marriage, she wasn’t depressed. She was able to tap into her vitality and vibrancy.”

Lappen and his wife eventually divorced, and he later remarried a woman who also has bipolar disorder.

“The good news is that we both have bipolar disorder; the bad news is that we both have bipolar disorder,” Lappen said, adding that their implicit understanding of the clinical nature of each other’s moods made for a smoother relationship.

Clinical Condition?

But experts are quick to point out that clinical mood disorders are not contagious per se.

Depression and bipolar disorder are complex, rooted in genetics and subtle brain chemistry. Experts point out that these disorders cannot infect people nearby the way a virus could.

“A depressed person will not give you the same clinical disorder by contagion. They’re just too complex for that,” said Ian Gotlib, professor of psychology and director of the Mood and Anxiety Disorders Laboratory at Stanford University. “It is rare that you yourself will develop that same psychiatric disorder.”

But a person with depression or other disorder can have a tremendous effect on those around them. Studies on college roommates show that when one person has depression, the other roommate can develop similar behaviors and feel more down.

“It’s not the mimicry, it’s the stress of being around them,” Gotlib said. “The mood stuff happens, but it’s not clinical.”

Coping strategies are critical when dealing with a depressed spouse.

“If the caregiver believes the behavior is caused by the illness, they are less likely to be affected,” Galynker said. “If they think the behavior is the result of a character flaw, they are more likely to be affected because then they also place blame on themselves.”

Carol Rossetti never thought she had a clinical condition, but she eventually became so unhappy with her husband that they separated.

“When I left him after 34 years of marriage, I didn’t think we’d get back together,” Carol said. “I was perfectly fine not being with him.”

But Ron quit his job and went through therapy to get his disorder under control, and after a year of separation, the Rossettis came together again. Now both Ron and Carol know how to maneuver around Ron’s episodes.

“The last ½ to two years have been the most worry-free of my life,” Carol said. “Now he’s a born-again bipolar person.”

That’s great, it starts with an earthquake

Back in the early late ’80s, I worked in a record store called Sounds Familiar in Columbia SC. I worked with one dude named Darius, who would later become somewhat famous as the lead singer of Hootie & the Blowfish. At that time, the band was nothing more than a REM cover band that rocked out at frat keggers.

I can still recall helping Darius decipher the lyrics to REM’s End of the World.

The following, from the ‘best of craigslist’, is largely unrelated, except at the very end. But it is all so damn true. . .

best of craigslist > seattle-tacoma > Prenancy Doesn’t Make You Divine… Originally Posted: Sun, 11 Jan 00:40 PST

Prenancy Doesn’t Make You Divine…

---

Date: 2009-01-11, 12:40AM PST

Yeah, we get it – You’re pregnant. BIG FUCKING DEAL. It’s not like you went to school for three years and had to take some excruciating multi-day certification. It’s not like you saved a Golden Retriever puppy from getting run over by a bus load of Norwegian tourists. It’s not like you cured macular degeneration. YOU SPREAD YOUR LEGS AND TOOK A MAN-MUSTARD INJECTION… Wow. Way to go. I am amazed you made it through such a mentally and physically demanding challenge that probably lasted all of 45 seconds (either natural or lab-grown.)

And now we are suppose to fawn all over you. We are suppose to act like it’s so incredibly difficult to get pregnant, and that you are now this pristine chalice of life -Something that deserves to be worshiped and adored.

Feel sick in the mornings? Do your feet hurt cause they are swelling? Gotta buy new clothes because you are 12 weeks along and have already put on 19 pounds? NOT MY PROBLEM. Do your job like you are suppose to and shut the hell up already.

…Oh btw – Quit using your pregnancy as an excuse to stuff your gullet each and every chance you get. When you proudly stand up at the staff party and announce that “The baby wants” an entire pint of Ben & Jerry’s Super Fudge Chunk, a liter of Dr. Pepper, some curly fries THEN TELL THE BABY TO SHUT THE FUCK UP.

Now what exactly do I have to look forward to for the next two or three years..? A constant stream of verbal diarrhea such as “little Bobby went to the toilet and pooped all by himself – But he forgot to wipe and then sat on the floor to pull his pants up! It was so precious, but there was poop everywhere!” or “I’m sorry I’m 40 minutes late, you see I have a four-year-old in potty training and we had an accident.” or “I don’t feel comfortable doing the speed limit, my baby is only two months old – You can go around.” FUCK YOU.

Two years after that and now I’m stuck behind you at the concession stand – And guess what? You feel it’s important to empower your child. It doesn’t matter that there are nine people behind you, you want little Bobby to make his own choice when it comes to artificially flavored processed movie snacks. By God, Bobby is special. He must be because that’s what all the Nike commercials say. There is only one Bobby and he is different from every other person on this earth. He is special by God, and he will be raised knowing he is special. And now, little Bobby has been standing there with his little index finger in his little mouth, staring at all the choices for the last FULL minute. But you aren’t the type of parent to acknowledge the fact that many people are waiting for little Bobby to make up his little mind. You don’t say something like “Hurry and choose something or I will choose for you” or even better “Other people are waiting, make up your mind” – Not you. Instead, you turn to the sea of humanity that has formed a marginally cohesive line behind you and look at them with an ‘I’m sure you all understand’ look. FUCK YOU. You are the same people that just can’t put their cell phone conversation on hold for 20 seconds while you order your venti no-whip-half-caff almond latte and spinach croissant – Instead you make eye contact with the waiter and raise that index finger. The index finger which happens to be the international signal for ‘I am a socially retarded fuckhead.’

One time I saw an interview with Hootie (of the Blowfish), with his wife. It was a lovely ‘What does Hootie and his wife do when he’s at home and not packing fans into concerts at 20 or 30% of capacity’ piece on some lame ass afternoon news biopic show. Anyway Hootie’s wife starts talking about kids and how they are such a miracle and (now she is actually tearing up) and she just can’t understand how anyone wouldn’t want to have children and HOW SHE JUST FEELS SORRY FOR THOSE PEOPLE. Oh yes honey, feel sorry for us. Obviously we are emotionally fractured because we don’t share the same fervent desire to add our particular goo to this world’s collective semen cesspool…

I don’t hate children. I hate the parents that think they are entitled because they have children…

It’s Gonna Be OK

Kindly spare me the year end Review of All Things ‘08.  Seriously, 2008 blew fat chunks of hell at me more or less non-stop.

One part that didnt’ suck was seeing Lady Gaga this month for free!  So cute.

Dalaran & Northrend

Like pretty much every other homo I know, I read Joe.My.God fairly regularly. Found his recent post and general cluelessness at the end really very cute. Believe me, I so know where those last two suggestions are. Oi.Last night I was Googling “how to get NYPD press credentials” to find a link for yesterday’s post, and these were the choices offered when I had gotten as far as typing “how to g”. Such a strange mix of suggestions. And where the hell are Dalaran and Northrend? I’m totally sure that I’ve never searched for anything on this list.

In My Pants

don’t tell your friends or i’ll say you’re a slut

plus it was your fault, you were rubbin’ my butt

Premature dudes are so lucky.

embedding disable by request (insert joke here) so here you go:

Like I Needed Another Reason to <3 Jack Black